Monday, April 10, 2006

Weekend update with Tina Fey

So, this weekend was fun. My Aunt from Baltimore came down for the weekend (she has 3 years sober). We basically had a blast. I feel bad because I dissed my AA friends for the weekend to spend most of it with her... she was up at my bro's place about an hours drive north, so I really didn't do much AA stuff on Friday or Saturday... but Sunday was an excellent 12 step meeting, so yea, it was a good weekend.

Funny thing though, I am a total loner, and it's like I am always thinking about when can I get to be by my lonesome and play on the computer, watch tv, or read. Is that weird or what? When I was drinking, I drank and isolated, doing those exact same things. I don't play the computer much any more, I do read and watch the boob tube, but it seems like I do so less often.. which is actually a good thing. If I isolate, and try to do things my way, it always ends up with me and a bottle of whiskey.

I really believe that if I am to remain sober, I need to be at an AA meeting every day and hanging out with AA folks as often as possible... which means starbucks instead of tv, computers, and reading.

I have about 2.5 weeks sober, which is the longest since I relapsed. I feel good, and I know now how important it is to be humble, be honest, and to have a relationship with a higher power. Also, it's even more important to admit that we will never truly be safe from this disease, and that when you think you finally figured it out, that is when you need to be extremely humble, and admit that God has it figured out, not you. If you think you have it figured out, that is a very slippery slope.

Regards

J

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