I know that I need to let go and let God. I know I need to work the program first and just kinda get happy with my current job... but honestly, it is still going to be a struggle.
This morning, I feel more serene, and closer to God. I still feel the negative feelings I felt yesterday, but not so much. I believe it has something to do with me going to a meeting last night, and then dinner with Sandy B. (Sandy is one of those Circuit Speakers, supposed to be like a rock star in AA) Well, it was just me and Sandy at dinner, so that was cool. Then I just went home and read a book and went to sleep. Got up this morning and felt better. I almost wish I could just quit my job and go to AA meetings all day. How sirene that would be!! But I know that is not possible. Sandy told me I needed to work the program, and with that would come happiness. And then, after I did the steps, I could think about a switch in the job, but first I need to focus on sobriety.
Thanks for the advice guys. I shall keep you posted!
You had lunch with Sandy B???? What the???
ReplyDeleteSandy was the main speaker at our round up in Sioux Falls last March. Then when my sponsor and I went to Akron Ohio for Founders Day (14,000 alcoholics at Dr Bob's house!) Sandy was the main speaker there, too! Next month, my sponsor is going to a round up in Minnesota, and Sandy is speaking there, too!
I'm glad you had the chance to talk with him. How did that ever happen???
Brad :-)
Actually, Sandy lives here in Tampa. He was my Grand Sponsor before I changed sponsors. I probably see him a couple times a week and usually have dinner with him at least 2-3 times a week. Oh yea, he was the very first person I met when I came into AA. He shook my hand at the meeting I went to and asked if I was new. He is such a nice guy! He travels all over the country and world speaking. So he has some really good stories.
ReplyDeleteWow that is really a blessing to sit and have dinner with Sandy B. I listen to Sandy speak at the XA Speakers site.
ReplyDeleteOnce you are able to give to yourself you then will be able to give to others . . . whether in AA or as a teacher. For now your sobriety will be the link that binds them all together. Keep that link strong. Your feelings are exactly as they should be, right now is a challenging time but you are never alone!
Keep Coming Back, thank you for your honesty and courage to post.
Wow that is really a blessing to sit and have dinner with Sandy B. I listen to Sandy speak at the XA Speakers site.
ReplyDeleteOnce you are able to give to yourself you then will be able to give to others . . . whether in AA or as a teacher. For now your sobriety will be the link that binds them all together. Keep that link strong. Your feelings are exactly as they should be, right now is a challenging time but you are never alone!
Keep Coming Back, thank you for your honesty and courage to post.
This is why we run things through others in the program first. People who have gone through already the things we are experiencing the first time.
ReplyDeleteA phrase we often hear ..."My best thinking got me here."
Wow, cool!
ReplyDeleteI own a 12-Step recovery book and gift store in St. Pete Beach - Lemuria Books, Gifts & Healing Arts, 371 Corey Ave. (727) 360-9773
ReplyDeleteI would like to invite Sandy B. as a guest speaker to our annual Gratitude Meeting. Does anyone know how to contact him?
Brenda