I believe I have found a huge problem in my sobriety. That is: Video Games and losing touch with all things human! I went to a meeting Saturday morning, and then took a nap. Shortly after, I was online, escaping into my favorite online video game character. I looked at the clock before I went to bed. I had spent nearly 6 hours playing this video game!!! And, I isolated that whole day as I obsessed about it. I found last week, that I was obsessing about the game while at work. I called my sponsor to talk about this. He told me about his strong sexual obsession, and how he would buy pornos and then throw them away, only to buy them again.
Well, he told me what I knew to be true. That I had to get more active in the fellowship and get off my ass and call people.... which I neglected to do Saturday night. He also said that if I got rid of the game I would probably play it again any ways, by re-downloading it or what not. I said, screw that! I am going to get rid of it, because it is just like alcohol. If it is in my house I will obsess about it and use it! So, today I have listed the character on ebay, and by the end of the week I will have sold him. Also, I will delete the game from my computer, and once again attempt to gain interest in my fellows.
I feel depressed and almost as if I let people down by letting this game be more important than things human...
I am sorry.
God help me let go of all these things which lead me astray...
You don't need to apologize. Because your head is beginning to clear up, you have become aware of something that needs changing.
ReplyDeleteThis will continue forever - as long as you stay sober. I guess that's why it's called a journey, not a destination.
Easy does it my friend, easy does it.
ReplyDeleteone foot in front of the other, as u wil learn in sobriety, alcohol and drugs are not the only things that rule our roosts.... I dont mean to say that you should go into an internet video game cave and disappear or anything but give yourself a break... :-)
ReplyDelete