Dinner and sobriety..

Tonight I went to the Bayshore meeting, and then hung out with a group of folks afterward. I really enjoyed the evening. All of my friends are just so cool.

I am really grateful for my roommate right now. I don't know why... just glad she is here. We are total opposites, so it's interesting. I get to practice patience with her and also my social skills. I realize that acceptance is the answer in everything I do today. We have different life styles, so in accepting her and including her in my home will result in some growth on my part! I get to see my character defects due to her being here.

I heard that relationships bring the defects out... this is no different, except we aren't sleeping together :)

That is about all for now. I am going to Baltimore in the morning and I plan on staying up fairly late tonight to pack and finalize some stuff on this end.

Oh yea, one more thing... need advice from the blogosphere...

I think I have a crush on one of my friends. Not sure what to do about it. I need to post this stuff, that is why I write a blog. This is one of the few places I get to be honest... almost as honest as I get with my sponsor. So yea, I think I like one of my friends. I don't think she is interested in me, so I really haven't pursued her. I have not ever even talked to her about this... and unsure of wether I should. But it is interesting feeling the way I do... its like I think there is no chance in hell that she'd remotely be interested... so I shut that thought down when it comes to mind. Typical low self esteem and huge ego.

So yea, I think my low self-esteem kicks in and says "NO WAY buddy! You loser! Girls don't think you are good looking! You suck! You are not COOL!". Anytime I think I like a girl these thoughts enter my mind and I immediatly go to friend mode... its easier that way, no risk for rejection! LOL! I have lots of girl friends as a direct result of this mechanism! Or maybe I am just a nice guy, and people want to be my friend too! Haha... I am cracking myself up tonight. Eh, I am tired. You know, it will all work out. God has a plan and I am just gonna keep on following his path and see where it leads.

:)

I am grateful for being single
I am thankful for my friends
and happy to be sober!

Jonathan